Minority Man

Desperate Singapore tried some unorthodox methods to subliminally persuade Indonesia to eradicate the haze problem. During the recent ASEAN meeting of environment ministers Singapore's Yuck-Cough Ibrahim undertook to light a cigarette and blow smoke towards his Indonesian counterpart's face. This was done to demonstrate that Singapore will not remain content to blow just hot air over the issue.

Dinner entertainment was provided by Singapore Idol Hazy Mirza singing a dedication to the Indonesian delegates with the song "Smoke Gets in Your Eyes".

----
Report from TODAY Newspaper

Battle against haze hots up

Wednesday • November 15, 2006

Ansley Ng
ansley@mediacorp.com.sg

THANKS to the lurking El Nino, which is threatening to strike in force next year, a strong sense of urgency has seized the region in the battle against haze.

In fact, what has been happening in the last five weeks, during which regional officials were engaged in a series of meetings, has yielded "hope and optimism", said Environment and Water Resources Minister Yaacob Ibrahim yesterday as he fielded questions from MPs on the haze situation.

Describing the measures that have been drawn up as "concrete", the minister however cautioned that it is not a problem that can be solved overnight.

"I am a bit more optimistic now that we have something concrete," said Dr Yaacob. "(But) will we solve the problem next year? I don't think so. We would require long-term effort."

Singaporeans should not expect this to be solved in one or two years, he said.

He explained: "You need concrete action at the ground to develop new capacities among farmers and land owners to make sure they resolve to use land clearing methods that were more environmentally friendly."

Even as they set out to fight the haze problem on two fronts, fire prevention and suppression, simply having farmers change their slash-and-burn method to the modern method to clear land would take some time, Dr Yaacob added. They would have to be given equipment, and be taught to use and maintain it.

While there is clear and strong political commitment on Indonesia's part to eradicate the problem, Dr Yaacob also said that the country needs to ratify the Asean (Association of South-east Asian Nations) Haze Agreement to show its political resolve.

He hopes details of the implementation plans will be sorted out before the Ministerial Committee meets again in February 2007.

In response to MP Madam Halimah Yacob (Jurong GRC) who wanted to know the impact of the haze problem on the economy and the health of the population, Dr Yaacob said that a local professor is studying economic losses from the haze. Prolonged periods of haze, he added, would lead to losses stemming from a rise in hospitalisation cost, tourism, productivity and recreational activities.

Q. What does Wee Shu Min tell her mole while looking at the mirror every single day ?

Ans: Get out of my elite, uncaring face



Q. Why did Shu Min's dad and RJC's principal insisit that she go for counselling ?

Ans: So she can get out of this elite, uncaring phase.



Q. Why won't the Internal Security Department hire Wee Shu Min ?

Ans: Due to traumatic personal experience, she may be reluctant to plant a mole on someone else.

A lady in China lost a lawsuit over compensation for lack of sex after her husband's cock was injured in an accident. The amount sought was 220,000 yuan (SG$43,500) to cover mental anguish and for the purchase of vibrators. I am guessing that this large figure means batteries were included.

Now that she lost the lawsuit, I suppose she could earn some money by acting in these adult movies:

Warning (NSFW)

Adult Movie 1 (Click on the large photo thumbnails on the left to see free previews)
Adult Movie 2

Read the related news article on Reuters:

China court rejects suit over right to sex

Reuters
Thursday, August 31, 2006; 4:19 AM

SHANGHAI (Reuters) - A Chinese court has rejected a woman's claims for compensation for her sex life, which was ruined when her husband was injured in an accident, the Shanghai Daily reported on Thursday.

Wei Suying, 31, whose husband has suffered from erectile dysfunction since a 2003 workplace accident, filed suit in a Shanghai court asking for 220,000 yuan ($27,650) in compensation from the shopping center where the accident occurred, it said.

The compensation included claims for mental anguish and for her purchases of products such as vibrators.

"I was not even 30 years old when my husband had the accident, which deprived me of my right to enjoy sexual life," the newspaper quoted Wei as saying.

But the court ruled that Chinese law does not define an individual's sex life as a protected right. Relatives can only ask for mental anguish compensation when a victim dies, the report said.

Wei's husband, Zhang Chengxiang, stumbled and hit his genitals on the corner of some audio equipment when an iron bar fell from a vent and knocked his head while he was working in a shopping center, it said.

The shopping center had paid Zhang 130,000 yuan ($16,340) in compensation in a previous lawsuit.

In pre-communist China, sex was less a taboo than it became under former leader Mao Zedong, when it became a matter of doing one's reproductive duty for the state.

Since then, the government has embarked upon a stern family planning policy to control a booming population -- the world's largest -- but official attitudes toward sex remain puritan, though they are changing slowly.

($1=7.956 Yuan)

PM Lee spoke about the Digital Age in his 2006 National Day Rally Speech. He mentioned a famous parody website and then went on to make a gaffe in Hokkien about ordering "mee siam" without "hum". In other words he went from talking cock to talking cockles.

The PM's assumption that mee siam contains cockles together with his refusal to allow someone else to vet his speech shows that he is very shellfish selfish.

Mr Brown's parody of "mai hum" may prompt PM Lee to avoid, like cockles, another food item: black-eyed peas.

Parody of the song "Cleaning Out My Closet". I don't think Eminem will be too thrilled by this. With the title containing words like "closet" and "out", I guess it was only a matter of time somebody, errr, came out to mock it.

Check it out, pun intended.

Zoe Tay has been offered to act in an adult movie. If she agrees, she would be appearing in number 23 of this DVD series. Zoe will not be the first Asian women to be featured though. Title number 8 stars Filipina Mei Yu.

Warning: NSFW
Click on this link for more info. Links to all titles appear on the bottom right.

S.W. Low of the Staid Times interviews Zoe Tay after the launch of the 'I Swallow' Imedeen skin tablets ad.

S.W. : So Zoe, do you really swallow ?

Zoe: Of course I do. That's the only way to take those pills.

S.W. : Did Phillip, your fighter pilot husband, have anything to say about this ad?

Zoe: He did express some concerns but I reassured him that people would think about pills and not other things when they see my ad. I think he found that hard to swallow.

S.W. : Is there anything you won't swallow ?

Zoe: Yes, my pride.

S.W. : (Mumbles) That explains that awards show fiasco with Fann and Christopher.

Zoe: What ???

S.W. : Nothing, nothing. I heard you love dogs. Is there a breed you don't like ?

Zoe: I don't fancy Spitz so much.

S.W. : So have you had any new offers to do ads ?

Zoe: Listerine wants me to do an 'I gargle' ad and a toy company wants me to do an 'I blow bubbles' ad. I also got a wierd offer. A special kind of bank asked me if I would like to do a "Sometimes I don't swallow but keep and donate" ad. They said it was a 'pilot' project. They want to increase their deposits from pilots. They were only interested in making an oral agreement with me.

S.W. : What do you think about your career prospects now ?

Zoe: I am very excited about my prospects. I think I will soon become the most popular star in Singapore, just like the good old days.

S.W.: You should not get too confident. There is a saying in the West, "One swallow does not make a summer".

Zoe: Huh? Singapore where got summer ?

S.W.: Never mind. Let's change topic. Singapore men must be wondering what your sex life is like since giving birth. Care to tell us ?

Zoe: You won't believe this but Phillip and I have become more adventurous.

S.W.: Wow, care to elaborate ?

Zoe: Let's just say that Philip, my fighter pilot husband, has access to 3 cock-pits when in bed with me.

S.W. : Last question. What advice do you give your fighter pilot husband so that he comes home safe ?

Zoe: I tell him "At home you can ejaculate in my cock-pits, but at work don't be late to eject from your cockpit.

Hot on the heels of her successful 'I Swallow' advertisement, Zoe Tay has been roped in by the government to help spread an old message.

Zoe Tay Campaign Poster

John Gray has just written a sequel to his bestseller. This latest book was written for male readers and is titled:

Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus, and Gays wish they were in Uranus.